Looks like we made it...

In two days, I will have been nursing Nathan for 18 months. When he was first born, I set lots of short-term goals and one long-term goal for our breastfeeding journey. My first small goal was 6 weeks because that is the time that "they" say that nursing gets a lot easier. Those first six weeks were filled with ups and downs. I had sore nipples and there was definitely a learning curve for both of us. Thankfully, we didn't have any major issues and we made it to six weeks. My next short-term goal was 6 months. 6 months was the time that I could begin solids and I knew that nursing would get easier after that. 6 months came and went and Nathan preferred nursing to solids anyway. My next goal was 1 year. I felt that if I gave my child a year of breastmilk I would be setting him up with the healthiest start possible. And we made it to one year easily.

Through all of that, my long-term goal has been 18 months. Babies and toddlers rarely wean themselves before the age of 18 months. Nursing strikes are common but can usually be resolved with patience and persistence. True gradual self-weaning normally happens between the ages of 18 months and 4 years. I knew that I would not be ok with him weaning before the age of 18 months. So my goal has been a year and a half of nursing. AND WE DID IT!!!!

Thankfully I have really enjoyed our nursing relationship over this time. I have really grown as a person and am much more confident in my mothering abilities. I just feel amazing that I did it. I pushed past the sore nipples, latch issues, teething, all-night nurse-a-thons, nursing through illness and injury, a nursing strike, nursing in public and the dirty looks from not-so-nice people, educating family and friends about why I was nursing this long, etc. The list goes on.

But I am not wonder-woman. I don't deserve a medal or any recognition at all for this. I am a mother. And this is what mothers do. I'm happy today because I could do this. I had the support that I needed from my husband. I had the support I needed from my family. The picture above is the platinum symbol for nursing for 18 months.

And I did it. Because I was so dedicated to this. I put my heart and soul into this and I did it. I can do anything! This feeling of strength and confidence is so amazing.

And for those wondering...My next and last goal is 2 years. If we make it to two years, then awesome! But if he decides to wean himself over the next 6 months, then I will still be proud.

Feel free to leave comments about nursing your little ones...best moments, biggest triumphs. Or if you don't want to post, just think about your nursing relationship today. Even if it lasted a few days, look back on that with fond memories. :)

Happy nursing to all! :)

It is a sad, sad day

Last summer, I was really trying to build up my freezer supply of breastmilk so that I could leave Nathan with a bottle of pumped milk. Little did I know then that my darling boy wanted nothing to do with a bottle. We kept trying and trying, but he would rather wait for Mama to return than use one!

So I had all this milk in my freezer. I worked really hard to get this. I can only pump around 1-2 oz at a time. So I had to pump multiple times a day just to fill one bag.

And now the time has come to throw it all away. :( I never thought that it would be this sad to see it go. This is liquid gold. I so wish that I would have found someone to donate this too before it "expired". Now this beautiful stuff is just going to get thrown out. :( Next time I have a child, I hope to be able to donate this a baby in need.

Sniff...sniff...

Bumper stickers!

Here are the bumper stickers I am ordering!! This one is basically to promote intactivism in the circ-happy midwest. If you would like more information on my stance on circumcision, please read this post by me. If one person sees this and wonders what I mean by it, then goes home and does some research, then it will all be worth it! Or maybe one mama, who like me, regrets doing this to her son, and she saves her future sons from it. Or a man, who had this done as a child and he can reach out to help himself or others. I am trying to turn my severe guilt and regret into something worthwhile. I am really trying to save others from this heartache.
I love this one! I think it really gets people to think about it. I mean why is the human species using another mammal's milk?! --Insert normal disclaimer here about how I really do understand when a small percentage of women cannot breastfeed and I am sorry for their loss of that relationship. I am saving this one. When I finally do get pregnant and begin planning my homebirth, I will slap this one on there. Can't wait for that!

Yes we are!

Still nursing that is!!! I get asked all the time. "Are you still nursing?!" "When do you plan on stopping?!" "I knew of one child who nursed until he was 5, please tell me you aren't doing that."

Well, step right up folks and grab a comfy seat. We are going to talk about breastfeeding and why it is so great to continue nursing into the toddler years.

So I thought I would break it down for you. The benefits of nursing a toddler:

1.) It is natural to me. There are no rules that state you MUST wean on your child's first birthday. Was I supposed to tell Nathan at midnight on his first birthday that he is too old for mama's milk? That line of thinking is insane to me. The need for breastmilk doesn't have a time stamp on it. In fact, the natural age of human weaning is between 2 and 7 years. This is just plain biology folks.

2.) Because it is purely convenient! I see toddlers having tantrums/ meltdowns/ bumps/ bruises/ fear issues all the time. How wonderful it is to know that if any of these comes up, Nathan can be calmed by nursing. It centers him. Allows him to feel connected to me in this crazy world. He is much more secure than other children his age. And this leads to me discuss the fact that toddlers who are nursing are thought of to be "dependant" and that mothers need to wean to make them independent. Nursing DOES NOT equal dependence. Nursing is a way for Nathan to be with me. To get nutrition and love from his mother. This doesn't mean that he isn't free to explore the world around him. Dr. Sears (a highly respected physician and attachment parenting guru) states "Contrary to the popular belief that extended attachment hinders independence, we notice that babies who are not prematurely rushed through any attachment stage and weaned before their time actually become more independent." Dr. Jack Newman agrees. He argues that a child who is allowed to wean on his own time is "more independent and more secure".

3.) He is so healthy. I provide him with antibodies and immunity every single day. In fact, Dr. Jack Newman states that "Some immune factors in breastmilk which protect the baby against infection are present in greater amounts in the second year of life than in the first." And it is a proven fact that children weaned before the age of two are at an increased rate of illness! (American Academy of Pediatrics)

4.) Nursing into toddlerhood promotes healthy brain development. Extensive research has found that breastfed babies in general have higher IQ scores and do better in school. The greatest gains occur in those children breastfed the longest.

5. ) There is no better food out there. Toddlers are picky eaters. Sometimes they don't get the nutrition that they need. The beauty of breastmilk is that I know that he is getting enough vitamins, protein, and fat in his diet. In fact, mothers who have been lactating for longer than one year has significantly increased fat and energy components in their milk.
448 ml of breastmilk provides: (Source Dewey 2001)
29% energy requirements
43% Protein requirements
36% Calcium requirements
75% Vitamin A requirements
94% Vitamin B requirements
60% Vitamin C requirements

6.) Healthier for me as well. My risk of breast cancer, ovarian cancer, uterine cancer, endometrial cancer, osteoporosis, and rheumatoid arthritis keeps going down the longer I nurse. Plus, it burns calories!

So there you have it friends. THIS is why I am still nursing. And not to mention the fact that I really do love it. Thanks for reading!

--So, no, I don't plan on weaning anytime soon. ;)

Easter pictures!

Nathan's Easter basket! We gave him an Elmo puppet and his own remote control. He loves Elmo!
See! Went straight for him!

Yum...Elmo! Poor Nathan has been teething up a storm! 2 more teeth came in this week!
Loves the puppet!
Such thought...
Hi there Elmo!
What a second....how come he isn't moving now?!

Had to take a break for breakfast! We have been nursing for 10 months!! Such a milestone!

Such a fun day! Nathan is just getting to be so big!

On the TTC front: CD 25, 9 DPO. I am pretty sure that we aren't pregnant this month. Having all my lovely PMS symptoms! Time will tell though....

It's Spring and big news at our house....

Although I think someone forgot to tell the weather. :( It is still cold and rainy here.

My mom sent me a text message from the beach yesterday! She is there on a cruise with my brothers for spring break. I wanted so badly to be there! The water looked so clear and blue and the sun was shining so bright!

So, I have really been searching my heart as to whether I should share the following news with all of you. I have debated in my head. But I have come to the conclusion that this blog is my way to communicate with the big world out there and if I weren't completely honest with the details of my life, then what is the purpose? Not to mention, I will need all the support I can get.

So our news....

Brandon received an offer for a new job. It was a pretty good offer. We would have liked to have seen more money but it was still good. Brandon is going to contact them back to see about offering more. So we shall see how that goes.

Either way though, Brandon and I are buying our house!! We currently rent it right now, but we really love it here and we don't want to move. So we are talking with the guy that owns it and the bank and we are buying it!!! I really hope everything works out ok.

If it does, we are getting the house loan for $15,000 more than what the house costs. We are using that extra $15,000 for another IVF cycle!!!!!!!!!! EEK!!!!!!!! We won't be doing the cycle right away. We plan on waiting until Nathan is done nursing (or really slowing down), but we will have the money in place for whenever we want to do it!!!!!!! Most likely it will happen late this year or early in 2009. This is huge news because before we talked about buying our house, we would have had to wait until our first IVF loan was paid off (2010). I really didn't want my kiddos to be 4 years apart! So we are thrilled and nervous and excited all at the same time!!

I think , I am more excited about the IVF cycle than I am the house! I am just really looking forward to having another little one, having a homebirth, cloth diapering a newborn, and breastfeeding all over again. But I can wait for sure. Nothing is more important to me than Nathan nursing, so we will wait until he is close to being done (because the IVF meds decrease milk supply). My ideal situation is for us to wait until Nathan is at least 18 months and only nursing a couple times a day. We shall see though! Its up to him!

So in related news, Brandon and I are officially trying to get pregnant the "old-fashioned" way. We are so hoping that, by the Grace of God, we get pregnant naturally, but we aren't expecting too much. So thus begins my new journey to trying to conceive (TTC: I will use this abbreviation a lot) a second little one. I plan to be really honest about this journey and as upfront as possible because I really want to have this record to look back on.

I think that it takes a lot of courage to try again. We have been through a lot on the infertility road. But now I know how amazing the reward is. Nathan makes every tear, every prayer, every heartache worth it. He is the light of my life and I can't wait to do it all over again.

And so blog-readers (if you are out there) welcome to the start of an amazing journey!!

Today is March 20th, I am on cycle day (CD: I will use this abbreviation a lot too) 21. I am 5 days past ovulation (DPO: again with the abbreviations) and I will be testing on Thursday March 27th.

Thanks for reading!

Attachment parenting: What it is and why we do it...

I never thought that I would subscribe to a particular type of parenting. Before I had Nathan, I just assumed that I would go with the flow and follow his lead. Turns out, THAT is the basis of something called Attachment Parenting.

Attachment parenting is based on following the child’s lead and creating a firm attachment between the parents and the child.

There are five concepts of attachment parenting as defined by Dr. Sears (an attachment parenting guru).

1. Bond and attach shortly after birth. The benefits of this are endless. attachment

2. Read and respond to his cues at all times. For example, when Nathan cries I go to him and comfort him. It is important for children to know that their parents will be there for them no matter what. Trusting my instincts is a major part of this concept. Many critics of this theory think that responding to your baby’s needs will “spoil” a child. Well, I would hate to see a child spoiled by too much love; that would be awful wouldn’t it?! Babies communicate by crying and answering those cries let Nathan know that I will always be there for him. Allowing him to "cry it out" (for example, many parents do this to "teach" children to go to sleep) is just something that I could not do. In fact, employing this technique is very detrimental to children. A study by Harvard university found that using this method often leads to post-traumatic stress disorders, anxiety issues, panic attacks, depression, insomnia, and a host of other problems as the child reaches adulthood. The study says that this particular American childrearing practice is influenced by fears that children will grow up dependent. But they say that these parents are on the wrong track: physical contact and reassurance will make children more secure and better able to form adult relationships when they finally head out on their own.

3. Breastfeed. We all know my thoughts on this one! But seriously, breastfeeding is the basis of healthy mother/ child attachment and connection. Not to mention all the other benefits.

4. Wear your baby. Using a sling or simply carrying your baby in stores and around the house promotes healthy attachment.

5. Co-sleeping. Sleeping close to Nathan allows me to respond to his nighttime needs. Parenting doesn’t end at sundown! It also makes for easier nighttime nursing. And there is nothing better than waking up to Nathan’s sweet face every morning.

There are other aspects to attachment parenting to apply as Nathan gets older.

I never ask that others practice the same parenting that I do. I just wanted to share how wonderful I think attachment parenting is.

Mama's going back to work!

Well, the time has come for me to return to work! I am a little sad but so excited about getting out of the house and working on my career again. I did go to college for 5 years to earn this degree, so I probably should use it! Anyway, I have an interview on Thursday for the perfect job! It is a part-time night shift position (11pm to 7am) in a Labor and Delivery unit in a nearby hospital. The hours are perfect. It would allow me to be home with Nathan during the day and be able to nurse him to sleep at night. Brandon would have to take over nighttime duty so hopefully Nathan will accept mama's milk in a cup or a bottle. I am sure that Daddy and Nathan will be just fine though.

I am hesitant about returning to Labor and Delivery because my experiences as a mommy have changed me. But I figure, it will probably help these mommies to have a nurse who is so supportive of breastfeeding. I can use my knowledge and passion to help get their nursing relationships off to a great start. :) I will let you all know how it goes on Thursday! Wish me luck!

Nathan loves nursing!

In his "I love nummies" shirt!

I thought that I would share some sweet pictures of my baby boy and me. Nursing is such an important part of both of our lives. The intense bond that nursing has created for us is so wonderful. My deepest hope is that all women get to experience the joys of nursing.

"...who shall bless thee with blessings of heaven above, blessings of the deep that lieth under, blessings of the breasts, and of the womb." Genesis 49:25

Sick with a capital "S"

Ugh....I feel horrible. I have the flu. I am so hoping that Nathan doesn't get it! He should be ok because he is getting all my antibodies from my milk. Thank goodness for breastfeeding at a time like this. Although my supply has decreased because I feel so yucky. So Mr. Nathan is nursing like a newborn! Which is good because I can lay on the couch and do that! Hopefully I feel better for the baptism and Brandon's birthday this weekend.

Speaking of Brandon, he always takes such good care of me when I don't feel well. He went into work early today so that he could come home early to help me. Such a sweetie. Love you honey! :)

P.S. Thank you all for your lovely comments on my little lion!

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month!

I would imagine that breast cancer is a terrible diagnosis to face. I cannot imagine the thought of something happening to my breasts. While they are not perfect, they are mine and whole. They have nourished my son for five months now. They make milk that is so sweet and rich that my 7lb 11oz boy has grown to over 20lbs. They are amazing and they make me feel amazing, as a mother, as a wife, and as a woman.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month. I urge all women to perform their self breast exams every month. I urge all women to breastfeed their babies. A study from Yale University found that women who breastfed for 2 years or longer reduced their risk of developing breast cancer by 50%. Many studies agree that the nation's rise in breast cancer rates can be linked to the fact that women in this country are choosing to use artificial infant formula instead of nursing. This is just one of the many reasons to nurse! And just one of the many reasons that I am proud to call myself a lactivist.

Last week was World Breastfeeding Week!!

This is one of my favorite nursing pictures. So incredibly sweet....

I just realized that I never posted about World Breastfeeding week!! Shame on me....

Nursing is one of the greatest things about being a mother. Here is my nursing story up to this point...

Nathan was born on May 12th 2007. After a lengthy pushing phase, poor Nathan was born with some breathing difficulties. They had to take him to the NICU for a couple of hours. While I was waiting to be able to see him, I just kept thinking about how I couldn't wait to begin nursing. I was so ready for him to be with me and ready to begin our lives together. Thankfully, 2 hours later, I was able to take my sweet babe to my room. After all the family cleared out, I was ready to nurse. I realized that I was a little nervous at the time, but I knew in my heart, that everything would be ok. I attempted to help Nathan latch on, but he wasn't really interested at the time. So I just let him lay against my breast, in hopes that we would wake and want to nurse. A couple of hours later, Nathan awoke with a new hunger. His tiny little mouth began searching for my nipple. Seconds later, Nathan latched. Such a beautiful sight. He needed a lot of help and guidance at first. We saw a couple of lactation consultants to improve his latch. He eventually figured it out, he was brand new after all and just learning!

The first 6 weeks were hard. Nathan nursed all the time and my nipples were quite sore. But I just kept telling myself that I was giving him the greatest gift a mother could give her child. After that first 6 weeks, life and nursing got a lot easier. Nathan spread out his nursing schedule and my nipples gradually healed. Now, at 3 months, our nursing relationship is as strong as ever. I love to look down at him and see his eyes flutter closed as he is nursing. He loves to lay his hand on my breast or reach up to touch my face. When he stops nursing long enough to look up at me and smile, my heart melts. I am so proud that he has doubled his birth weight all on my milk. I am so proud that I can do this for my baby.